The Ballad of Gumby Joe Biden

What won’t Joe Biden support? What won’t Joe Biden condemn? Joe Biden does more flip flops than most Olympic gymnast; the latest is on the Hyde amendment.

The Hyde amendment may be the last bastion of common sense to pertain to abortion; it bans the use of federal funds for abortions.

Joe Biden has been entrenched in the political swamp since 1972, I’m sure that by now he’s uncertain where he begins and the bureaucratic sludge ends. I’ve consumed mass information regarding all things Biden for several months now, thoroughly convinced that there’s not a bone in this man’s body.

It’s not just Biden’s infamous flip flops either, he portrays himself as a blue collar salt of the Earth dude but comes off as quite sleazy. When you condense everything that Joe’s about into a single scope, it becomes quite evident that his only conviction is whatever it takes to get elected.

In ’96 Biden voted for the Defense of Marriage Act which supports natural law and prohibits same-sex marriage. In 2012 Biden stated that now he was “absolutely comfortable with the fact that men marrying men, women marrying women,” while on Meet the Press. This is significant because the political climate for Democrats, at that time, was really going all in on the homosexual express.

Sixteen years after the fact, Biden phoned Anita Hill to apologize; perhaps her phone was off the hook. Are we to believe that Joe didn’t bend like a paper clip when faced by the gravity of the Me Too Movement and slather up a sincere heartfelt “Duh I’m sowwy” to Miss Hill?

What do you take us for Joe? Dam you.

Biden says he voted against Clarence Thomas, so what was the apology for?

Anita “Shiny Faced” Hill

Joe asks Hill to tell everyone what the most embarrassing of all the incidents were to which she alleged. What a creep, you could tell he was champing at the bit to smell her lovely hair.

Also, don’t forget that Catholic Joe did not support Roe V Wade and once supported an amendment to overturn Roe V Wade in 1981. True to fashion, in 1982 he voted against that very same proposal. Just for the record, Biden also did a flip-pity flop on partial-birth abortions.

I love the smell of Asian hair, it’s delightful

Biden is atrocious on foreign affairs; he initially claimed that US involvement in Iraq served no interest only to later support the removal of Saddam. To no one’s shock Biden was also one of our politicians to have mistakenly claimed that Iraq had WMD’s.

Joe Biden’s biography must read like the medical report for a case study in schizophrenia, they should call him Sybil Biden.

Joe would make a perfect car salesman, I would have hired him in a heartbeat. A man who will literally say anything to get the sale, he’s the kind of guy that would steal your wallet and help you fill out the police report.

In closing, perhaps the most frightening aspect to Gumby Joe is that so many Americans would support him as President, that’s alarming! Republicans, conservatives and everyone else on the right should not be the only voices of concern. Every American with any remnants of a brain should be aware of charlatans like Biden and his mass appeal to the lowest common denominator.

Your gonna let me smell that fuckin’ hair missy, I was Vice President

When did America become so populated with these egregious lowest common denominators?

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Bonus footage:

Further proof of what an imbecile we’re dealing with, everybody fucks up now and again but Joe takes the cake!

(Below) Joe takes a swipe at Trump supporters

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